The past week has felt a bit all over the place, both in labs and real life. The
start of the week saw me move flat and running a number of odd jobs as a
result, I’m sure you can imagine without elaborating too deeply. So after
lugging my bags up the road and buying the bits and bobs I was needing for the
new digs it’s was late Tuesday afternoon before I managed to get back into
Bede. That’s obviously had an impact on what I’ve been able to get done this
week and in all honestly I don’t think I quite managed to return the week to
feeling normal following Monday and Tuesday’s absence in labs.
The biggest problem I felt is the notion of going
round in circles which at the end of the week there doesn’t look to be much
progress from its beginning. In actuality there’s been a lot of designing, blocking
out, redesigning, tweaking models, unwrapping, into unreal, etc. You get the idea.
However I can’t quite shake the feeling that I’ve just got myself all wound up
into a quagmire. It’s still a phase where there’s a lot of input before I’ll
start seeing real, tangible results.
That belief of getting nowhere with the
project has put a bit of a downer on the week which ain’t great, it doesn’t
help that I wanted to be further ahead with this but the feedback I’m getting
from Mike and others is that the slog I’m in at the moment isn’t something I
should be worrying about, nor is it entirely out of the ordinary. Definitely
talking to Ben over the weekend has helped to settle my mind a little with it
and he’s pointed me in the directional of an incredibly useful Unreal level
which you’ll be reading about more next week that’s helped to put a lot of
things in my mind into perspective.
After my weekend discussion its put me in a
much more focused and positive outlook for next week and fortunately not stuck
feeling like there’s been no progress. But God, I don’t get too emotional or
gushy on here but it’s like being stuck to a yoyo constantly been thrown up,
down, round and round with this project. I’m running empty on professional
detachment.
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